Jesse ‘Boots Electric’ Hughes: I’ll go on record with this: I love Britney Spears. I think she’s great. I really do. I don’t think anyone has the right to look down on her. She’s accomplished more shit simply as a performer than most people will accomplish in their actual lives. Hold on a second, dude, my mother’s on the other line. Let me just tell her to stop calling. [One minute passes.] Hello? Dude, my mom’s so rad. She’s like, “You’re doing an interview with The Onion? Awesome!” See, we love The Onion.
I have every Britney Spears album ever made, and I ain’t ashamed of that. She gets the best producers and songwriters money can buy, and puts them to work on her albums. That sounds like a pretty good production effort to me. And she’s got hot tits and a wonderful ass and she likes to make herself beautiful, just for me. If somebody puts on Britney Spears and you ain’t dancing, it’s probably because you’re Stephen Hawking.
Indeed.
Ummm…. I’m going to have to disagree with you on that. Maybe it’s just the old college radio DJ music snob in my talking, but I just can’t agree with that.
I’m just glad to see you’re out of your metrosexual closet. If it takes Jesse Hughes saying he likes Britney to help you, then so be it.
Sorry, not metrosexual, patriotic. Have you forgotten what Ms. Spears has in common with Metallica, Bruce Springsteen, AC/DC and Eminem? Employment in the war against terror as an interrogation tactic at Gitmo. Of course, Skinny Puppy would have been more appropriate being German and all.
Skinny Puppy are fun and all, but I’d vote for the big (German) guns. Einsturzende Neubauten would have freaked the hell out of those guys. I guess they already figured they were in hell so it actually might not have added much.
If I were the torturers I would probably use Yanni and that annoying blind Italian guy that breathily sings opera. Maybe throw in some Michael Bolton just to vary things a little.